Do you want to not have negative emotions as you want to be happy all the time? What if your negative emotions are a key to your well being?
What if rather than judge an emotion as negative or positive we considered that they are, what they are, emotions, and .....
I believe every emotion has a message.
If the emotion you are feeling makes you feel good you must be thinking and doing and being in a place and with people that have been a part of your well being. If you have an emotion and you are not feeling good, what if that is a message to think, sense, do something different to restore your ease and contentment.
We have lost contact with understanding the messages from our physical sensory body since we have become so dominated with making meaning from words. Our words have become more and more abstract and we use technology and our distant from felt experiences that help us make meaning and all of this is outside of ourselves. Sure we need words, but we also make meaning from:
our emotions, our senses, images, kinaesthetically, from music, nature, spiritually, movement and more.
Rather than judge an emotion as negative my suggestion is to be with whatever emotion arises, yes experience it.
While you are experiencing your emotion know that you are not your emotion.
Remember this, otherwise you may become overwhelmed by your emotion and create more anxiety as if you are the emotion.
If you know there is a part of you that is not the emotion you can communicate with that part of you.
You can soothe that part of you if it is needs comforting.
You can expel the energy if that energy needs to move.
You can learn to listen and to ask what that emotion needs from you to bring yourself back to a state of ease and contentment and creativity.
Imagine there is a part of you that is experiencing the emotion and is not the emotion. So from the loving adult, curious part of you that senses the emotion and is not the emotion ask:
(remember ask the emotion as if it is an energy that can communicate with you)
What is this emotion communicating to me? Whilst it is hard to generalise here are some examples,
If I feel fear, what do I need to do to create safety?
If I feel anger, where has someone violated me or soneone else? How can I restore respectful boundaries?
If I feel frustration, what other action can I take?
If I feel anxiety, what can I do to create ease?
If I feel controlled, who or what is controlling me? What do I need to do to create freedom for myself?
If I feel repulsion, who or what is doing something that is "bad" or unethical or cruel? What can I do to protect myself and or others?
If I feel content, what am I doing or thinking that has created contentment? How can I continue to do more of that?
Etc etc etc
Life is like being on a swing. If you become resilient you can constantly come back to contentment no matter how much turbulence.
Action this week:
Are your negative emotions a key to your well being? Check how you move from:
from frustration to contentment?
from fear to safety?
from anger to peace?
If you liked this you might also like, 'How happy are you?"
Are you stuck? Want to learn how to become resilient in your life? Apply for Mentoring here.