A few years back I had what you'd call "bad days" Actually they were worse than bad. My energy was completely drained away. I remember getting up and being focused on my projects and then losing my energy to complete them and needing to go for walks, have coffee and even go back to bed rather than getting to work in my own Management Consultancy business.
I'd start off with enthusiasm
I'd be inspired to create a great relationship with my now, ex-defacto, get on and work with my clients doing team building, communications and conflict resolution, but I couldn’t I was too distracted.
My body’s energy would drain away. I would start to write a submission or an article for my work and then I would feel a sense of loss and emptiness.
I felt as if I was suffering internally. I'd get some work done after a long struggle. This work would have taken me no time at all in the past when I was connected to my truth.
Many of my articles were incomplete. I had to let go of my Management Consultancy for a period of time.
Over time I realized my body was very wise. My body was letting me know that the choices I had taken were not good for me. They were not allowing me to thrive. My mind and the endless conversations I was having with my inner crew (all the little voices in your head) were telling me I could “make the relationship work”. I just had to be more loving, more compassionate, more understanding or something.
But every time I did what my thoughts told me to do I felt worse. I was giving, giving, giving and the other person was taking, taking, taking and there was nothing left for me.
I started doing things to energise and nourish me and I began to notice changes in my Voice. When I was doing what I loved and was with people who respected me, I felt nourished and I had lots of energy. In those times my voice seemed to be deep within my body, solid and full of energy. When I was with my now ex-defacto my voice would falter, it would sound weaker, I could feel my voice coming from a higher part of my body and it was high pitched. I was constantly being de-meaned, intimidated and undermined. My sense of myself was gradually eroding and it was showing up in my voice and in my body.
I had a few realizations about my situation but it took me awhile to finally see my blind spot.
It wasn't even a magic trick
It was something I'd known for a long time, but I was resisting and denying what my body was telling me. My body knew the relationship did not serve me. My mind thought I could make it work. There was a dis-connect. Noticing my voice change was another key to accessing my Intuitive Body Wisdom. I had a turning point and I've never looked back.
Taking actions that are no longer aligned with my inner truth are no longer the reality
In fact the opposite is true. I have so much energy, so much work that I want to do, so little time.
So how do you get to connect with your Intuitive Body Wisdom?
There are many ways. One is through Noticing the Energy in your Voice. Yu can find out more about this in my conversation with Trish Watts, Voice and Movement Professional on my second Podcast for the Intuitive Body Wisdom Series.
You can also take action now:
Notice how your voice changes when you are intimidated or fear speaking your truth?
Notice what your voice is like when you are feeling powerful and speaking your truth?
Notice other people and see if you can pick up when they are speaking their truth or when they are not?
There are many aspects of body awareness to learn. This week focus on your voice.
Love you to share your stories and questions in the comments below. What are you noticing?